MSLD 641 Module 9 - Becoming a Resonant Leader: A letter to myself

Becoming a Resonant Leader

A Letter to Myself

          Dear me,

            I hope by now you understood what being resonant means, and that slowly you can start putting in practice all the learning outcomes of the past eight weeks. Do not lose track of “our” vision, which, ultimately, is to live the world a better place. Bellow follows “our” learning agenda to ensure we positively impacting on people’s lives as we cross paths with them. What I want for “our” future is to be able to help people develop themselves, cognitively and emotionally, in their personal, social, and professional scope. Do not forget to achieve our milestones following the action steps in this letter, even if it is necessary to adapt them along the way. Be alert, be attuned, and be connected to yourself (or should I say ourselves?) and with the world around you! Since we are one, I will speak to you in the first person.

Professional Learning Goal

            My professional learning goal is to develop and implement leadership programs for organizations (including non-profit). This goal requires a lot of financial support, therefore most of the milestones will involve saving money and looking for funds to make it possible. The first milestone will be getting an MBTI® (Myers & Briggs Type Indicator) certification. The action steps to achieve it involves include the certification in my budget within the next six months and register for it.
            The second milestone is getting an executive coaching certification. It will require saving money for that within the next year, and to analyze which coach institute (certification) will better fit my needs. When these two action steps are completed, I will then register for it.
            The third milestone, to be achieved in the longer-term, is to complete an Executive Strategy course. The greatest challenge is the financial requirement, as this course is way beyond my budget. If I manage to get the funds to do so, then the action step would be to register for this course.

            A fourth milestone is to have a strong network. This milestone is to be achieved throughout the process of change, and not being the last one, in this particular order. The action steps involve using a professional social media account (LinkedIn for instance) to start with. I have created the account on the past week, which was the first action step. Further, I consider doing an internship in organizations that provides this type of service or working in projects alongside experienced professionals.

Community/ Social Learning Goal

            Open a charity for neglected teens and elders in Brazil is my community goal. To start with, I need to have a network to support me in the process. The steps to achieve this milestone is to connect with people currently working in projects and charities and to have supportive relationships as governmental and local corporations. Initially, this step would be taken virtually, as I currently live in another country. Then I plan to get personally in touch with the networks, in my trips to Brazil, and when returning permanently to the country, build a strong supporting network to make it happen.

            Another milestone is to learn the laws, regulations, and policies to have a charity or organize non-profit projects, in the country and the city I plan to have my initiative. An action step is to start researching it online (empirically and practically with experienced people). The first milestone is a supporting step for this one, as being in touch with people already in this field, could work as guidance and mentorship.
            The milestone is to have a deeper understanding of the situation (inventory of charities and people in need). For that, one action step would be getting in the field in existing initiatives. Once again, broadening my network is a helpful first step for this one. Getting in touch with government departments to collect data is another action step. This milestone will be possible, mainly, when I return to Brazil, for good.

Personal/ Family Learning Goal

            This goal is a continuous process and probably an endless goal. My personal objective is to build a mental and emotionally healthy family, by contributing to my knowledge. The first milestone is to be a mother. It goes without saying that one action step is to get pregnant, which does not depend only on me. I have stopped birth control one year ago, to allow my body to function naturally. The next step is to be able to live with my husband, as we are in a long-distance marriage. This step was supposed to be taken already but is delayed due to the pandemic. By mid-July, I, along with my husband, will reevaluate how this step will be taken since it involves other variables now. Independent, this step is expected to be completed by August.
            Another milestone is to have a more balanced life. One action step is finding a routine and build up a daily agenda, including physical, mental, and spiritual activities, which will all contribute to my emotional state. I have been working on this step already, but I am planning to improve by tomorrow, with the end of my master’s degree classes. I believe balance to be crucial to achieving my personal goal.
            A third milestone is to read books and articles about marriage, motherhood, and parenting. The first action step to start research on it. The first book I want to read is “How to Talk so Kids will Listen & Listen so Kids will Talk” by Faber and Mazlish. I and my husband usually read the same book about marriage, at the same time. The last one we have read is the popular “The Five languages of Love” by Gary Chapman. We plan to continue on this action step continuously.

Supporting Relationship

            There are key people to help me to achieve my learning goals. They play a different role in different goals, either holding me accountable, helping me to see another perspective and deeper points of view, and assisting me in seeing my blind spots. One person that I chose to assist me emotionally, and who is an intrinsic part of my life is my husband. He is always cheering for my dreams to come true, so this relationship is crucial to help in achieving my goals. My father is another key person, as he is a typical critical thinker and always encouraged me to think through. My best friend is a huge supporting relationship, as she helps me with resources of whatever subject I mentioned I am interest on. She also has a strong scientific network, since she is a scientist herself, being employed at Cornell University and working on her post-doctorate degree.

            More neutral relationships are three colleagues I have in my organization, which I bond with for their strive for personal development. With them, I can share ideas and short-term achievements to celebrate small wins and get ideas. My current operational manager is another relationship I can count with, as she often coaches me and pushes me to develop myself.
      
            Dear me. The most important relationship is ours! Without it, no goal will be achieved. Let us keep our bond strong, let us keep aware and stick to the positive picture of our future. Together we can make it happen!!!

MSLD 641 Module 8 - Personal Balance Sheet

Personal Balance Sheet

            People who truly intend to change needs to see all aspects of their life, with an accurate sense of themselves. Biology, life experience, and the situation at hand form one’s unique characteristics, while we constantly evolve and adapt throughout life (McKee, Boyatzis, & Johnston, 2008). Discovering our real selves is a crucial step towards intentional change. Identifying who we truly are, enables us to find the gaps necessary to be filled in order to achieve who we want to be (Boyatzis & McKee, 2005). To enhance my self-awareness, I evaluated my assets and liabilities, found through self-reflection and dialogue with an intimate circle of people in my life.

Assets

            My distinctive strengths. Based on my perspective, my strengths are critical thinking and organization skills. My critical thinking is related to problem-solving. When time is available, I usually go around the circle through most (or all) of the elements of reasoning before I make a decision (Nosich, 2012). For instance, once I needed to deal with a security situation on board, and any decision would cause a type of disruption, either involving the cost to the company or lay off (in the short run). I did not have too long to think of it, but I thought about all the possible security consequences in the long run, not only for my team, department, or my company but for the aviation industry. I engaged with my direct report involved in the situation and got her input. We discussed and in minutes I decided to go for the broader decision, although it would cause a short-term disruption and probably a high cost to the company. I considered priorities I should not compromise for financial consequences.

            My organization skills are related to look for ways to facilitate the process of task completion. I tend to see what can be done to improve processes and procedures and enhance the quality of service. For instance, I have been grounded due to a medical issue and worked in a department which helped with internal customers. I noticed a pattern and repetitive requests from different people. I decided on my own to design a sheet in order to collect data, so I could suggest to my manager a FAQ in the company portal, workshops to be hosted, or an increase of staff on popular departments. While still collecting data, my manager noticed my initiative while close to my table and was surprised by it. What I developed became a standard in the department, and some of my suggestions were followed through.

            Based on what others see on me, I often get 360° feedback on my organization skills (for the same reason mentioned above) and for my balanced approach in leadership. When getting upward feedback, direct reports usually mention I guide without a parenting style, I am kind and relaxed but not soft and hands-off, I am hands-on without micromanaging and when needed I know how to stand up and be decisive. This feedback about balance I also get in my personal life, through my family, friends, and relatives.

            My potential strength. Initiative is a strength that I could apply more broadly. Often when I see an opportunity to help someone in my personal and professional circle, I stop whatever I am doing to look for ways to make it happen. When it comes to my own aspirations or liabilities, the same rule does not apply, I postpone possible initiatives and steps that could assist in making my dreams coming true.

            My enduring dispositions (effective and I do not want to change). A habit I do not want to change that usually helps me, is my analytical thinking process, which is intrinsically related to my critical thinking, mentioned as my distinctive strength. I also would like to keep my practicability and ability to see the big picture, without compromising my priorities. Compassion is a trait I often witness rooted in my behaviors, which helps me to be successful, personally, and professionally speaking.

 Liabilities

            Weaknesses I want to do better. Time management is a potential strength, as I do apply in some situations, but I believe it is my greatest weakness. When I have a deadline, and I know I will be the only one impacted by the quality of work, I tend to postpone the task. For instance, in my studies, I leave assignments to be completed on the due date, although I start earlier. It is something so simple to solve, as it just involves self-discipline, but I usually fail in improve in this aspect of my life.

            Mind-wandering is another weakness (Jha, 2017). Even when listening to others, my mind is already rushing to past experiences related to it, linkable subjects, conclusion, and if is the case, possible solutions. It quite often plays in my or my team’s favor, but sometimes it takes form me the opportunity to connect to people or see the rots of an issue or situation.

            Weaknesses I want to change. A weakness I want to change is my “over-speaking”. I would like to learn how to listen more, and while speaking, being more straightforward. When giving direction I usually do not have an issue, but when telling a story, explaining my thoughts or trying to influence people, I usually speak more than necessary, and quite often I get distracted from the main point. This is led, I believe, by my over-thinking characteristic, which takes me back to my mind wandering.

            My enduring dispositions that get on my way (but I do not want to change). Paradoxically, my analytical thinking process is an asset and a liability. While effective, my analytical operational system turns the process of decision making (personal and professionally) inefficient. I fall into analysis-paralysis for a while, which in critical situations, it can drastically change the consequences. Although it is an enduring disposition that often gets on my way, I do not want to change, since it often leads me to positive outcomes.

References

Boyatzis, R., & McKee, A. (2005). Resonant leadership. Boston, MA: Harvard Business School Press

Jha, A. (2017). How to tame your wandering mind. Retrieved from https://www.ted.com/talks/amishi_jha_how_to_tame_your_wandering_mind

McKee, A., Boyatzis, R., & Johnston, F. (2008). Becoming a resonant leader. Boston, MA: Harvard Business School Press

Nosich, G. M. (2012). Learning to think things through: A guide to critical thinking across the curriculum (4th ed). Boston, MA: Pearson

MSLD 641 Module 7 - Appreciating Your "Real Self"

Appreciating Your "Real Self"

           

            Having an accurate perception of our real selves and the world around us is crucial to a balanced life. People who manage to use the life’s laboratory to keep themselves awake, aware and continuous learning tend to be resilient and strong in the face of internal and external stress because they attend to personal renewal as a way of life (Boyatzis & McKee, 2005; McKee, Boyatzis & Johnston, 2008; Jha, 2017). When one wait for issues to become problems, the effort, energy and time to recover (when possible) are greater, and everything happening around in the meantime is wasted, since our focus is often entirely directed to recovery mode. If one is tuned and does not wait for harsher life wake-up calls, renewal, not recovery, becomes the norm. While in renewal mode, one is able to broaden perspectives, with the lenses not fixated in self broken pieces, but in past and future whole-self, while humbly aware of the present. With broader views and openness, life goes on, challenges are turned into opportunities, raw opportunities do not pass unnoticed, and one lives life instead of simply surviving. But why even smart people do not use life’s laboratory?

            Drowned in the common busy adult life, it is easy to miss the subtle wake-up calls. A way to dribble this challenge is regular mindfulness practices that enable a balanced view of our whole selves, along with self-reflection. This involves an analysis of our body, mind, spirit, and emotion, not only in the present moment but with a positive view of our future ideal selves (Boyatzis & McKee, 2005; McKee, Boyatzis & Johnston, 2008; Creswell, 2017). Going through some real and ideal self exercises, along with balance seeking and mindfulness intentional chance reflections I did not find any surprises in my outputs.

            I believe I have not found surprises because I am constantly self-reflecting, often more than I wish, and rarely able to control. I self-reflect at any idle time, and since I live alone and there is nothing much about work I can do on my days off, I spend long hours on my own, in which I spend a major part of it just thinking, talking to myself, mentally living possible future moments (positive and negative), going back in time and processing what could have been different that was under my control, so on and so forth. Mind-wandering, in my view, is my biggest weakness and my greatest strength. When alone, I struggle to be in the present moment, but since I go back and forth, I am tuned with myself. When with others, I give my quality time, mentally traveling just to enrich the conversation (which sometimes affects how I appear to be interested). Although there were no surprises about myself, I figured some interesting points through the exercises and reflection.

            First, by writing down on the Medicine Wheel, I had a clearer picture of the gap between my real and ideal self, along with a practical and simple way to minimize the gap aiming more resonance (Boyatzis & McKee, 2005; McKee, Boyatzis & Johnston, 2008; Boyatzis, 2006). Secondly, reflecting on necessary mindful changes, I figured about thoughts and habits I need to eliminate in order to let resonance flow and enable continuous renewal. Last, but not least, I found two (out of four) limiting beliefs that I have not thought of as such before. I am constricting myself with theses believes, as an argument to remain in the comfort zone. But was is awareness without action?

            Tuning with my subtle wake-up calls cleared the path for me to see farther and further. From now I will stop using these two “new-found” limiting beliefs, to remove two more barriers to my ideal self. Along with this action, I plan to work on my ten development areas found in the Medicine Wheel, two by two, as an achievable learning agenda with small wins to have a compound effect (Boyatzis & McKee, 2005; Hardy, 2010). Most importantly, I will practice monthly body, mind, spirit, and emotional “check-ups” to keep tuned, using the Medicine Wheel as a model.

References

Boyatzis, R. E. (2006). An overview of intentional change from a complexity perspective. Journal of Management Development 25(7), 607-623. doi: 10.1108/02621710610678445

Boyatzis, R., & McKee, A. (2005). Resonant leadership. Boston, MA: Harvard Business School Press

Creswell, J. D. (2017). Mindfulness interventions. Annual Review of Psychology, 68(1), 491-516. doi:10.1146/annurev-psych-042716-051139

Jha, A. (2017). How to your wandering mind. Retrieved from https://www.ted.com/talks/amishi_jha_how_to_tame_your_wandering_mind

McKee, A., Boyatzis, R., & Johnston, F. (2008). Becoming a resonant leader. Boston, MA: Harvard Business School Press

Hardy, D. (2010). The compound effect: Jumpstart your income, your life, your success. New York, NY: Vanguard Press